When we have compassion for others
Aware that they are suffering
feel the desire to help the suffering person
offer understanding and kindness to others when they fail or make mistakes, rather than judging them harshly
realize that suffering, failure, and imperfection is part of the shared human experience
compassion isn’t only something that we should apply to others
Instead of mercilessly judging and criticizing yourself for various inadequacies or shortcomings, self-compassion means you are kind and understanding when confronted with personal failings
Research shows that self-compassion is one of the most powerful tools we have to create health and happiness. Self-compassion motivates us to achieve our goals, cope with adversity, take responsibility for our actions, and care for others in a sustainable way.
It does not mean to ignore hard times or put a positive spin on them to make ourselves feel better. It just means we can honor them for the way they made us stronger, better, and wisen.
Yes, we can let the pain be exactly what they are without trying to find the "reason." Because the people we become through surviving the pain is far more important than the pain itself. With this in mind, our hearts will naturally begin to heal.